It mainly consists of BSK fighting through Portal2Hell,
this doom ripoff that’s hollow story wise
and looks neat visually
but not nearly neat enough to take up one hundred fucking pages.
The game explains that:
"I really hope he takes advantage of its unique storytelling
approach instead of just having it be a gimmick
that gets old like 30 pages in."
-me a few days ago
It tells it's story through screenshots
of a 13 year old boy's internet sessions
during the early days of the internet,
and uses collages of windows and chatrooms
to present it's story to us.
George Wylesol's colorful rendition of the young web
is pure eye-candy
both for people nostalgic for this era
and for someone like me who's interested in it.
Each window and the content on it is structured in a way
where the general layout of any given page looks genuine
and not ridgedly put together for the reader's convinience
yet simultaneously
flows really well as a graphic novel.
It's sort of comparable to the ergodic layout of something like
House of Leaves,
having the reader really Traverse each page.
I think this books art style and presentation are brilliant,
so what a shame that it's used
to prop up such a bland and uninspired story...
My main criticism with this book
is that it uses it's art style to give us a peek into the lives
of people who really aren't
interesting
likable
or even entertaining to watch.
A thirteen year old using the internet to fight the fucking Devil?
It's such a silly and outlandish idea that you could go pretty far with!
Just imagine the kind of hyper-internet-autist-basement dweller
thirteen year old who would pull that off, and it's not long
before a lot of possible paths come to mind!
George chose to go down a path
that's not Just boring and juvenile in a bad way,
but even winds up stripping his art style of what made it so compelling for me.
Hope you weren't expecting that lovely art style
to be matched with characters and a story
that are interesting,
weird
or smart,
because our protagonist is one BSKskater191,
your average nihilistic thirteen year old boy
who has nothing better to do with his computer
than complain about school on his blog
and talk about online sex freaks with his friend.
Pretty much all characters except for one
are completely flat like this and would be forgettable
if the art style wasn’t so seared into my mind.
Unsurprisingly, the one part of the story I like
happens to be the only time George actually builds up a character:
the About Me section of the satanic cults leader, Reverend E. Pleasant.
Maybe it's cuz I have no nostalgia for the 90's Internet
but I didn't resonate with or care about the cast at all,
which would've already made it difficult for me to care wherever the story goes.
The second half is what I consider the worst of this book.
It mainly consists of BSK fighting through Portal2Hell,
this doom ripoff that’s hollow story wise
and looks neat visually
but not nearly neat enough to take up one hundred fucking pages.
The game explains that:
And, uh, yeah. In terms of story,
other than two moments I liked sprinkled about,
it never deviates from this rhythm.
All there is to it is kill motherfuckers.
In terms of visuals AND gameplay,
it’s not nearly interesting enough to stand on it’s own two legs.
Yet despite BSK’s harsh criticism on the left,
he never opens any other tabs or windows
so all we have to chew on is this uninspired doom clone
that isn’t even presented to us in a creative or unorthidox way.
Occasionally there are popup ads for COTHL,
but they don't really progress the story at all.
A girl he’s talking to who was ALSO invited to the game isn’t even playing with him,
so there’s no chatrooms between them that could’ve offered
some kind of character development
or growth
or anything.
“This surreal near death experience has shattered my cynical teenage outlook
and showed me the importance of respect
and the value of the adults in my life whom I resent.
Maybe Mrs Brown isn’t such a big dumb bitch after all…”
Nope. Nothing.
Idk about yall but I read books for stories, not doom playthroughs.
“And then he shot the Imp!
And then he shot the Zombieman!
And then he shot the Revenant!” Just isn’t my cup of tea,
even if it IS nice to look at.
The two moments I liked were the one you already saw of BSK shitting on the game,
and one where George actually presents it creatively:
We get a third person shot of BSK looking at his parents and two different dialogue boxes in this shot.
He could’ve used these more throughout the book,
but then again something would actually have to happen to warrant it…
Other than that,
this section of Internet Crusader falls completley flat on it's face.
The unique and intuitive desktop pages that were this books biggest (and really only) strength
are lost in favor of a hundred page long Doom parody.
What a letdown.
As critical as i've been of Internet Crusader, I'm still keeping it on my bookshelf.
The massive untapped potential of its first half makes me want to take it with me into the future.
I could easily see someone taking this formula and turning it into an ergodic legend akin to the aforementioned House of Leaves, or maybe even creating a new subgenre entirely.
I will say that even though this book didn't really come together for me, it's unlike anything I've read before and it's definitely left an impression on me.
It's a failed attempt, but an admirable one.
I think I'm gonna end it there, I've already spent too much time putting this page together.
If you read this far, lemme know what you thought of this page down below!
Originally all the text and pictures were gonna be inside a scroll box like my journal,
but then I was inspired by howThis place presented it's story to the reader,
and while I don't think my review is super in depth nor is it's layout super creative, I do think it's much more engaging to read than it would've been originally.
I'll utilize this style more in the future and really make it my own. BACK HOME
Samewise, johto
Night Light